Love comes and it disrupts the equilibrium of our little universe called life.
You told me you are okay, that you are fine. But how could you be fine? We both know how excited we are about ‘him’. It doesn’t make sense, but at some points, I seemed to be much more excited than you. Perhaps, it’s my nature of being an older sister that fuels all that added excitement. Which sister wouldn’t want to see her dearest one find ‘extra’ happiness and joy in her life? He captured your heart almost instantaneously. Highly talented and extremely accomplished, it is not hard to see why you set your eyes on him.
You keep trying to convince me that you are ‘happy’ to find out about this ‘fact’ now, when things are at their earlier stages. But we all know when there is expectation, there is bound to be disappointment.
My Dear One, let me tell you something. It is okay to be not okay. It is beyond fine to take a quiet time and let the realization hits you. It will hurt, it may break your heart a little because after all we are all human. Don’t hide your disappointment behind a facade of ‘it’s okay or I’m fine’ when you are not. Because as Lang Leav said : “It’s okay to be hurting as much as you are. What you are feeling is not only completely valid but necessary – because it makes us so much more human.” In a way, admitting it and facing the truth directly lead to proper closure. It may have not developed into something deeper, but it has started. And everything that has started, needs a proper closure.
Instead of telling yourself you are okay, it’s okay to admit that there is a lingering pang of disappointment inside your heart. Tell yourself, “it hurts now, but I will be fine, eventually.” Cause the truth is, you will.
You don’t tell me, and you don’t have to actually, but I know that somewhere between yesterday and today, you may have felt that you are losing something great, and during those times, it is hard to imagine and convince yourself that you will find someone else who impresses you as much as he once did. But trust me, you will. I know this may sound extremely cliché, but you found him, didn’t you? There are numerous other hidden gems out there and you will stumble upon them, the same way you stumbled upon him.
One thing you have to remember is that his rejection is not because you aren’t worth it. I don’t want you to think that you are not good enough. You are fiercely real. You are extremely talented. You stick to your values. You are accomplished. You are admirable. You are amazing. You are lovable. One day, he will realize what he misses out. Anyone who can’t see how amazing you are as a person doesn’t deserve to be with you in the first place.